Mock This

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I'm bradley and it's my job to keep you from being the sucker at the table.

So what are we looking at right now? A bad case of football withdrawal. You're in the desert. Alone. No means of feeding your desire for football, unless you're desperate and settle for some time with the UFL.

That'll end fast. 

So where does that leave you? With wall to wall Mel Kiper every day until the draft mercifully ends his act?

Spare me.

What's the alternative? The Mock Draft of the month club.

It's all you see. Every person with an opinion is driving home their version of what's going to happen on draft day in April. 

Now, sure, it's fun to sit with friends over a couple of fermented beverages and talk about the what-could-be's and the what-might-be's. You can argue for an hour or two  about trades that could happen and scenarios that might happen that could land that number one prospect in your teams lap while the other 31 NFL teams fall asleep at the switch. But after a while, you take your credit card, and leave with your sanity intact. And it's never discussed again, until the real thing happens. Because you're not that big a nerd. You've got a life.

But there's those who can't help themselves and for them, it's the Mock Draft industry. This is the never ending torture that gets replayed with hundreds of know-nothing's spouting on every open sports feed available. And - as if it's not enough - some go for the ultimate torture - versions 2, 3, 4 - hell, I've seen versions run to 7 and 8.

There should be a law.

A Mock Draft is cool once or twice with friends. But once it becomes a cottage industry, it becomes painful, like being a Rockies fan. 

The question that keeps coming up is - why do I care? Am I gonna think you're brilliant because you nail the first five picks in the draft? No. All it does is make me realize how lucky the NFL is to have suckers carry their water for them, to get through the quietest part of the offseason, where they couldn't generate a headline for themselves unless some player ran naked through a car wash.

Back when baseball meant something to us, we used to call it the hot stove league. Before free agency became a thing, you'd talk baseball trades from the end of the World Series right up until the first pitch of spring training. It made baseball what it was for so long. Football, and the Mock Draft, is the next step in that evolution.

So take a deep breath. These guys don't know a hell of a lot more than you do. In fact, a lot of teams use them to leak bogus news about what they're  thinking of doing. Useful idiots, if you will. Have fun with your friends for a night - then, when you start to see the Mock Drafts pop up,  mock paying attention.

I'm bradley - don't be the sucker at the table